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Financial problems in marriage – A true relationship killer
Is money so hard to understand? Financial problems in marriage are definitely a true relationship killer. It’s one of the most common marriage problems that unnecessarily result in divorce.
Money matters are quite simple when you think about it. You can either afford something or you can’t. If you can’t you have two choices, either stop spending money elsewhere or earn more money.
How to Save Your Marriage from Money Problems – 3 Part Course
Think about the number of people who fund such as a car purchase on finance then struggle to make the repayments. Now, it’s understandable the need for a car and that people aren’t always in the position to buy such an expensive item out right. However, what is amazing is the type of vehicles that people buy on finance.
One of my best friends always buys cars on credit and not any old car, cars such as range rovers, mercedes and jaguars. Yet he struggles to make the monthly mortgage repayments let alone fund the financing on the car.
As a family they look at us and envy the fact that we don’t have to worry when an unexpected bill comes in or if we want something we can just go out and buy it without any concern.
That’s because we follow the main golden rule for avoiding financial problems in a marriage, we never spend what we haven’t got ! And, we don’t waste money on unnecessary interest repayments.
It’s quite a simple concept really, if we want something that isn’t critical we wait for it; we only buy what we can afford. If we needed to take out finance for a car we would buy something that would do the job but not a luxury vehicle.
Have you ever seen how many luxury cars are repossessed and go through the auctions? What a waste, just look at what is lost in the initial deposit and interest and then the cars lost and sold for peanuts to more the financially astute.
How to Save Your Marriage from Money Problems – 3 Part Course
Top Financial Problems in Marriage:
Money is the No. 1 thing couples argue about. Here are the financial issues that are tearing couples apart.
- Opposing attitudes toward money – few couples actually take the time to really understand each other’s views on spending and saving.
- Mismatched financial priorities – it can become a point of contention if partners aren’t on the same page so it’s important to identify financial priorities.
- Credit card debt – severe credit card debt is a sure fire way to inadvertently schedule divorce proceedings.
- Financial infidelity – financial infidelity can have devastating consequences on trust and honesty – the cornerstones of any marriage.
Examples include secret bank accounts, undisclosed debt, hidden purchases, or gambling addictions. - Overextending budgets – poor purchasing and spending decisions that put couples into debt.
- Inability to compromise on spending – learning how to make compromises is key to keeping a healthy and happy marriage.
- Major impulse buys – most couples would agree that major buys should be done as a couple.
- Unexpected major expenses – Another cause of divorce is stress and disagreements over major unexpected expenses.
These could include caring for an elderly relative, medical emergencies and major home repairs. - Spending too much on the wedding – Remember, you also deserve a great married financial life after the wedding.
- Not having pre-marriage financial counseling – couples should also talk to someone for pre-marriage financial counseling.
- Loss of financial control – the most common is when a woman is made to feel marginalized because of her perceived lack of contribution or influence in building family wealth.
Anyway, back to my friends, their marriage is always under strain because financial problems in the marriage which are continually at the forethought of their minds. When you have financial issues in a marriage you never know from one month to another how to fund the next mortgage payment or car repayment. Petty things get blown out of perspective because stress levels run high which all stems from the financial problems in marriage.
Couples get upset with each other and yet they are both to blame. Couples both want what they can’t afford and, even though they may earn far more than most, with every penny they earn their expectations increase, their spending increases and the financial problems continue.
So many couples let themselves into financial problems just because they choose to ignore money issues, expect them to disappear, resolve themselves without any effort. However, just like any other marriage problem financial issues need to be addressed, nipped in the bud before they become out of hand.
Fighting isn’t the answer to financial problems in marriage:
Arguing doesn’t solve anything and it certainly doesn’t address the real cause of the problem which is all down to supply and demand. In doesn’t really matter how the original problem occurred, why money is now short and why bills can’t be paid. Generally the fault doesn’t tend to lie with one person. The question is how soon are you both going to face up to the issue, get your head out of the clouds and start doing something about it.
I was speaking to a friend the other night and he was fighting an issue from a totally different corner from his wife to be, forgetting the whole concept that marriage is all down to team work. Working together to resolve anything that life throws at you is so important. When you loose focus, fail to see what really matters in life, start arguing and fighting against each other rather than working together to sort such issues out you start to chip away at the very foundations of what could be a solid relationship.
Debt and Marriage Can Result in Stress
No matter how your financial problems in marriage developed, blissful ignorance, credit card happy, making an important financial decision without discussing it or just spending too much every week, you have to now sit down together, focus on the issue at hand, forget what has happened in the past, how you got into the situation in the first place and put all your time and energy into sorting it out.
Don’t blame anyone, don’t go looking for a fight just sit down, detail your spending, detail your earnings and then work out how you close the gap. Support each other through the process, work together towards the same goal which is to learn to live within your means whether that be through working more hours, retraining for a higher paid job, finding opportunities to earn extra cash from home or just accepting you are living outside your means and working out how you can spend less.
Don’t let financial problems cloud your marriage, sort out the financial problems in marriage before you destroy something very special and live to regret it.
How to Save Your Marriage from Money Problems – 3 Part Course
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